The book of Proverbs gives a lot of examples of what a godly young man looks like. It tells us what wisdom looks like and what folly looks like. Proverbs 31:3-5, 8&9 says this:
"Do not give your strength to women, or your ways to that which destroys kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine, or for rulers to desire strong drink, for they will drink and forget what is decreed, and pervert the rights of all the afflicted...
Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all the unfortunate. Open your mouth, judge righteously, and defend the rights of the afflicted and needy."
That passage lays out what a man should and shouldn't do.
1) He shouldn't give his strength to women or his ways to that which destroys kings
2) He shouldn't drink wine or desire strong drink
3) He should open his mouth for the mute and for the rights of all the unfortunate.
4) He should judge righteously and defend the rights of the afflicted and needy.
His delight should be in the law of the Lord, and in that law he should meditate, day and night. He should be like a tree, firmly planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither and in whatever he does, he will prosper. (Taken from Psalm 1)
His love for God should define him; it should be totally evident to me and to the rest of the world that God is the most important thing in his life.
Another big deal is: what does he treat his mom like? Or his sisters, if he has them. Does he treat them with the respect and love that they deserve? Is he a total gentleman towards them? It's honestly a breath of fresh air when I see a guy talking to his mom in the hallway at church and holding the door for his sisters and helping them carry their bags to the car. That's a real man for you.
I have met a lot of guys in my 17 and 3/4 years (I'm so past the half marker now :) There have been very few that I have respected and even fewer that I have thought I could possibly "date". Are my standards too high? Do I expect too much?
I don't think so. All of my standards and expectations come from what I have seen played out by my older brothers. All 6 or 7 or 8 of them. They have showed me what real men look like, and they've showed me what sacrificial love looks like.
I have seen that real men know when you stand up for what they believe in, but they also know when you just let something go and not fight it. They know what's worth fighting for.
Real men will be leaders. They will lead in love, intimacy, righteousness, selflessness and the word of God. (One of my older brothers told me that. :)He won't want or expect you to make decisions, but he will realize that you can have your say in the matter.
A real man will take care of himself, you and others. He will watch out for those he cares about. He will keep himself healthy and take care of his body.
A real man will be a missionary, always reflecting Jesus. It doesn't matter if he lives in his hometown or moves to Africa, he will always let the light of Jesus shine.
A real man will love me for who I am. He will love me when I am at my very best, and when I'm at my very worst. Sometimes I wonder if he could ever really love me when I'm having a really bad day and am super emotional. But then I see my brothers, who love their wives unconditionally, and I see that they love me unconditionally. That gives me hope.
My boy will love my family. He'll be a part of the family, and feel right at home. (Maybe not right away, because at the beginning some members of my family will probably make it severely awkward for everyone concerned... :) He'll be able to hang out with them and enjoy their company even when I'm not around.
A real man will work hard. Even when it's hot outside and he'd rather be in the air conditioning, or even when it's freezing and he'd rather be inside with a cup of coffee. (He will like coffee, right??)
My boy will love Jesus, love me, and love our kids, even before they're born. He'll love his family, my family, and our family.
You may be thinking that my boy doesn't exist; you may be wondering if I'll ever meet a guy like that. Well, there's hope. My older brothers fulfill all those requirements, so I know that there must be more guys like that out there. So, I'll just wait until he comes along. It may be sooner rather than later, or maybe later rather than sooner. Either way, he'll be a gift from God, a gift that I don't deserve.