Monday, September 17, 2012

Preparing For Someday, Part 5: So...What If I Never Get Married?

Happy Monday, friends! I'm so glad to be back. I feel like I've been on a long vacation. Thomas and Becca got married on Saturday and the wedding was BEAUTIFUL and SO MUCH FUN and HAPPY and every good thing. :) I was a bridesmaid along with Becca's roommate, Meagan and her sister, Lindsay. The wedding ceremony was beautiful, and the reception was awesome and turned into a dance party! We all had a blast. And now they're married and will live happily ever after! :)

But anyway, onto today's topic which is: So...What If I Never Get Married? (Inward shudder, anyone?) And as a side-note, isn't it a little ironic that this is the topic when I just finished talking about my brother's amazing wedding?? :)

Personally, this is something that I rarely ever think about. Not because I'm okay with being single but because I'm scared to death to think about it. It literally freaks me out a little when I think about never getting married.  

When I think about it, I ask myself questions like: what would I do with my time? How would I survive? Will I just live with Mom and Dad for the rest of my life? 

This is a serious question to ask yourself. What would you do if you never got married? Or what would you do if you didn't get married until you were, say, 25 or 30? 

There is never a promise in the Bible that every girl who really desires marriage will get married. God owes us nothing. Yes, He does bless some of us and some people do end up getting married, but marriage is not a given. 

So...what if I never get married? What if you never get married?

"But I want you to be free from concern. One who is unmarried is concerned about the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord; but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how he may please his wife, and his interests are divided. The woman who is unmarried, and the virgin, is concerned about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and spirit; but the one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how she may please her husband. This I say for your own benefit; not to put a restraint up on you, but to promote what is appropriate and to secure undistracted devotion to the Lord." (1 Corinthians 7: 32-35)

Whew. Serious verses there, Jen. Don't fuss at me, fuss at Paul. He wrote them. Don't take them lightly.

I want to ask you something. 

Are you concerned about the things of the Lord? Are you holy in both body and spirit? 

God has really been teaching me lately that if I am not truly desiring Him and loving Him with my whole heart, then really, marriage is not an option. I can never be a good wife if I am not a good daughter to Him. 

What are you doing with your single years? Are you wasting them?

I have been guilty of wasting my single years. I haven't invested enough time in my relationship with God, my family or friends. However, I'm not done being single yet.

So here's a list of things that I personally am working on while I'm not married:

1) Be concerned about the things of the Lord. Be holy in both body and spirit. Delight myself in the Lord.

2) Learn patience. 

3) Enjoy the little things in life that may seem mundane. 

4) Remember that God is working. If He wasn't working, I wouldn't be here.

Just four simple things. The thing is, even if I never get married, I can still work on those things. I can still perfect them. Because marriage is not promised me. And so I want God to be my main goal. 

If I never get married, I will still be striving to please the Lord in every move I make. No matter what I'm doing. Whether I'm still living at home and helping my mom and helping train my younger siblings; whether I'm working for my brother or teaching piano lessons; whether I move out and live in a different city or become a full-time nanny...or if I get married and have at least 7 matter what, I want to be pleasing to the Lord. 

You can do so much more for the Lord while you're single. Most of the younger women that have mentored me have done so while they were single. GraceAnna, Jillian, Becca, all women who mentored me while they were single; all girls who were concerned about the things of the Lord and then were blessed and got married. 

If you know that you've been wasting your single years up to this point, realize that there is still hope. We can learn together. We can pray together. We can even cry together when life gets tough. But let's decide that today can be different. Today we can start being concerned about the things of the Lord. 

"But you, be sober in all things, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry." (2 Timothy 4:5)


Thank you so much for reading and commenting! You make me smile! Have a fantastic day, friend.