the hobbit, birthdays, christmas and other things

Hi! I pinky promise that I haven't forgotten about this here blog of mine. In fact, it has been very much on my mind lately. I've been thinking about writing and why I write and what I want to write about and when to write and all those fine details lately. I've come to a couple of conclusions that I'll share with you some time soon.

on to the past two weeks in review:

Tuesday, December 11th: we performed our annual Christmas program. I wrote a song about Mary and my siblings performed everything from James Taylor's Jingle Bells to The Jackson 5's Santa Claus Is Coming to Town.

That night we also celebrated mine and Michael's birthdays! Michael was born December 16th, and mine is the 15th. So we always celebrate together. It's special to me that our birthdays are close together.
I was given all my birthday presents that night. I. was. shocked. They gave me a 3 day trip to Savannah, GA with Mom!! We left on a Sunday (December 16th) after church, drove the hour to get there and stayed til Tuesday. Those three days involved: a photo shoot with a dear friend, Starbucks date with Becca, Barnes and Noble, Catholic church tour, more Starbucks, watching all of Gone With the Wind, lunch with Heather and baby Zeke, attending Catholic Mass, and then going to surprise Becca at the coffee shop she works at. It was so much fun. And I took minimum pictures. ;) sorry.

Friday, December 14th: Dad, Michael, Heather, Jamie and I went to see The Hobbit. Okay. Let's just say I was blown away. I'm a Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit fanatic. I have read the books several times, written a ballad based on the LOTR books, written music to one of J.R.R. Tolkien's poems...yeah, it runs deep. I was so nervous when the movie was starting, and, let's just be honest here, I cried. Yes I did. It was an amazing movie.

Saturday, December 15th: I turned 18. Enough said.

Sunday through Tuesday: (16th-18th) in Savannah

and then Saturday, December 22nd: saw the Hobbit again with three friends. It was so much fun. Then went Goodwill shopping with one of the friends. We had a blast. :) (Em, we definitely have to do it again!)

And then Christmas. And now here I am. Ready to get back to normal life. Ready to start writing again!

Have a great weekend, friends, and I'll see you soon!! :)

 

happy birthday

to Michael.

My big brother. My mentor. The one who watches me cry and makes me feel better. My boss. My hero.

Thanks, Michael, for being there for me for the past 18 years. Thanks for the long talks, the times you watched me cry, the emails, the job, and so many more things. I love you. :)

Happy 25th birthday! :)



Your,
Jen

this girl (a post about me)

In only 17 more days, I will be 18 years old. That is freakily exciting. Scary and wonderful. Honestly, folks, it blows my mind. Tell me it blows your mind too so that I will feel better. (Mom, it doesn’t count for you. Of course it blows your mind that your baby girl will be 18 in only 17 days!) But seriously, I feel slightly intimidated, like I’m not ready to be eighteen.

I think my uncertainty about this age started when a certain boy had his 22nd a few weeks ago. We talked on his birthday about how 22 was so official and old and adultish... (not technically a word, but who cares?). He said, “Yeah, today just felt like a normal Wednesday. I got up, went to work and came home. It was uneventful.” We laughed about it and then he said, “It’s kind of like turning 35. Like my life is officially over.” It was a sarcastic comment, but it got me to thinking. That’s always dangerous.

I started thinking about growing up. Growing old. I know, I know. I’m not going to be ancient when this birthday comes around. But I’ll be 18! Thomas turned 22 this year. Michael will turn 25 the day after I turn 18. We’re all getting older. It’s crazy. Michael’s married and runs businesses and  has a kid. (and a cute kid at that). Thomas is married and living in Savannah and working and hiking mountains.

And then there’s me. 17-almost-18-year-old Jennifer Mole. A wannabe author. A girl who’s biggest dream is to get married and have babies. Someone who when she is at home with her siblings will blast the music and have a dance party in the kitchen. The girl who wishes she could sing like Whitney Houston, or play piano like Lionel Ritchie. 

The girl who loves loves loves old music, (go look up Sherry by Frankie Valli. You’ll love me.) and the colour blue and the smell of coffee and soft hair and hugs from her brothers and long talks with her mom and driving her car and cell phones and friends and role models and old black and white movies and TV shows and emails from friends who live far away. The girl who cries easily. 

The girl who loves hard and has given her heart away too often. The girl who feels like a hypocrite because she doesn’t live out some of the stuff she blogs about. The girl who reads minds and can tell when something is wrong with one of her friends. The girl who loves being around people. The girl with many friends. The girl who dislikes conflict but isn’t afraid of it. 

The girl who always speaks before she thinks and then ends up feeling bad later on. The girl who is discerning, but sometimes not discerning enough. The girl who gets irritated easily but can’t stay mad for long. The girl who absolutely cannot ignore a person. Doesn’t do the silent treatment. The girl who laughs really loud. The girl who isn’t at all afraid to speak her mind or tell a person what she thinks of them. 
The girl who has a reputation for being a talker, not a thinker. 

The girl who started a blog simply because her best friends begged her to. The girl who gives in easily. The girl who hates doing laundry and ironing but has conquered her hatred for washing dishes. The girl who has bad days. And I mean really bad ones. The girl who sometimes wonders if she will ever get married or be in a relationship or have a guy for her best friend.The girl who would die for her younger siblings, but has a hard time being nice to them on a daily basis. The girl who hates math. The girl who has a love affair with music. The girl who thinks her mom is the bomb. The girl who loves her daddy. 

The girl who loves Jesus more than anything else. The girl who will be 18 in only 17 more days. The girl who feels like she's only 8.

Yep. That's me. You probably just learned more about me in that post that you have in every other post I've ever written. Honesty isn't always easy, friend. Sometimes it means telling things about yourself that you might not want to share. But I promised myself I would always be honest on my blog. So there's my honesty for the day. 

Today remember that Jesus loves you just as you are. It's not based on anything you have done, but based on what He has done for you. He is good and His love endures forever. Have a good day, friend. 






 

thanksgiving and a birthday

Happy Thanksgiving! Friend, remember everything you have to be thankful for. Give thanks today, and enjoy your time with your loved ones. And eat as much as you want! :)


Today is a very special girl's birthday. Last year at this point, I had no idea this girl was even on the planet. She is a California girl and I live in South Carolina. She's a dreamer, and so I am. We met through the blogging world, and became friends. Many comments and some emails later, we've realized that we're kindred spirits.

isn't she adorable? (stole this right off her blog... ;)

Today is Erin's birthday. Head over to her blog and give her many happy birthday wishes. :)

Erin, thanks for the many encouraging posts you have written and for your heart for Jesus. You are a light shining in a dark world and I am so glad we connected! I hope that this next year is one in which you can serve the Lord more fully and be fulfilled by Him more than you ever have before. And make your dreams come true, girl. :) Love you! (and one of these days I will come visit you! promise! :)

thankfulness

Thursday is Thanksgiving. But you knew that, right? If you didn't, you are in need of some help, I'm afraid. Moving on...

Lately I've been thinking about thankfulness. My thoughts even led to starting a "things I'm thankful for" page on my blog. I just keep adding things to that list. It's funny how much I actually have to be thankful for. So much more than I think I ever realized. God has seriously blessed me, y'all. 

So here's a list of things I'm thankful for right now:
-a new cell phone
-Zeke
-younger siblings
-our "we are thankful for..." white board at our house
-water
-iPods
-older brothers
-Mom
-Dad
-relatives coming into town for Thanksgiving
-Gamecocks/Clemson game on Saturday (which I am attending in person... ;)

and so many more things. God is good. He gives me so many things that I don't need and I don't deserve, but He gives them to me just to show that He loves me and that He cares. And I'm thankful for that, friend. I'm thankful for His love for me, even though I don't deserve it. 

I'll be back after Thanksgiving has passed, full of turkey and ham and many desserts, with some thoughts on legalism, grace, husbands/guys (yep, going back to that topic again), convictions and other things. And if at any time, you have a question or would like me to write a post on a certain subject, just email me at betterthatway@gmail.com. I would love to hear from you!

Happy Thanksgiving, friend.       

our thankfulness board

thoughts on God's sweet love, fulfillment and finding yourself

God is good, friends. His love is so sweet. A dear friend of mine put it this way: "Weddings are sweet, but marriage is sweeter. Marriage is sweet, but Christ is sweeter still. Keep seeking and treasuring Him." I loved her words. We get so caught up in the moments of everyday life that we often miss out on who God is and what He has for us. My life has been like that lately. 

I've been caught up in a situation in my life. Caught up in making things happen, caught up in what I wanted and how I could get it. So caught up that I wasn't allowing God to work in me and through me. So caught up that I was missing on something sweet: His plan for me!

It's so easy to (conveniently) forget about His plan when we have an idea of what we want. It's easy to get caught up in something or someone just because we want that, and then leave Him out of the equation. Trying to squeeze God to make Him fit our plans never works out very well. 

Last night I wrote these words in my journal:
"What the heck is God doing? I want so badly to just know. To trust and believe and hope again. To be free from hurting and wondering and waiting. I want to be fulfilled by Him...tonight I just want to be secure and fulfilled again."

After I finished writing those words, I read this quote in the corner of my journal:
"The most difficult thing to let go of is my self, that self which, coddled and cozened, becomes smaller as it becomes heavier. I don't understand how and why I come to be only as I lose myself, but I know from long experience that this is so." (Madeleine L'Engle, author of A Wrinkle In Time)

As I read that, tears came to my eyes. I realized that the only way to be "fulfilled by Him" is to let Him fulfill me. He can't do something that I won't let Him do. It wasn't His fault that I wasn't fulfilled. As I sat on my bed, I picked up my iPod and clicked shuffle. I had no idea what song was going to come on, but the song that did come on sent me to my knees. As soon as I realized what it was, I started crying. 

"Yesterday I could not feel this
 Today I'm sick of trying 
 To live like I can live on my own
 This world around me is suffocating 
 I keep forgetting to turn and run to You.

 So find me, wherever I am, won't You find me?
 I got myself lost and I don't think I want to be roaming in heartache.
 Please find me tonight.

 I make it hard and I can't stand it
 Can't wrap my head around it 
 I wrestle with You more than I should
 I make a mess of everything but You see the best in me
 I'll never be too far gone. 

 So find me, wherever I am won't You find me?
 I got myself lost and I don't think I want to be roaming in heartache.
 Please find me tonight." 
(Lyrics by Everyday Sunday-Find Me Tonight)

I hadn't listened to that song in years. It had never made an impact on me. I thought it was a nice song, but that was it. But last night, it hit me and it hit me hard. I was on my knees, crying my eyes out, finally understanding that it's only when we lose ourselves that God can work. Only when we let go of what we want, can He give us what He has for us. Only when we realize just how sweet His love is can we really begin to be fulfilled. 

Friend, life isn't always easy. Sometimes it's hard, sometimes the growing hurts, sometimes relationships end, sometimes you wonder what God's doing...but just know that He is doing something even if you can't see it. God knows what He's doing and He never makes mistakes. 

Rest in Him today, friend. His love is so sweet and He will sustain you. And remember that:
 "... the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor & honor. No good thing will He withhold from those whose walk is blameless.”

(a special thanks to Mom for being such an amazing friend and mentor, Erin for sharing the verse with me, and my sisters for taking the pictures. :)

happy birthday

to one of the best boys in the world.

He makes me laugh.

He makes me cry (basically because I miss him all the time)

He is so talented.

He loves Jesus. He loves Becca. He loves his family.

And he loves me.

So a very happy birthday to my boy, Thomas. I love you more than you could possibly imagine. Thanks for making my life happy. 

I hope that this next year brings you many opportunites to make
your dreams come true. 

some pictures to make your Saturday happy (hopefully! :)

Here's some pictures for you to enjoy this Saturday!

Zeke!

ooohhh, wish I had one of those right now!

Madeline (Bubble) and me (Clank)

me and Jessie

classic roller coaster faces

piano lesson time!

yep. that's about right.

Have a happy weekend, friends! :) 

learning about contentment

If any of you are like me at all, you will relate to this. You'll totally get the fact that I struggle with being content. You'll understand that I long for change. You'll be right there with me on the minimal patience thing. 

Lately, God's being teaching me a lesson about contentment. He's been teaching me that it isn't a huge deal. That it isn't about tomorrow or three years down the road. He's taught me that contentment is about today. It's about how I react to today and the situations I encounter today. 

 If you really stop to think about it, contentment is all about being grateful. It's all about being thankful for what you have and not wishing for other things. So this post is about some things I'm super thankful for. 

 How could I not be thankful for that adorable thing? Zeke is amazing. He spent all day Saturday with us and we got to have some "Aunt Jen-Zeke" time. It was great! :) 

 Absolutely gorgeous sunsets. 

That picture. It's on my wall and makes me laugh every time I look at it.

 Those two people. That picture. Seriously. Makes me smile every time I see it. (Yes, you can say "aww...")

And then that girl. She's a really good friend of mine, Frances. We got to hang out for a while on Sunday night. She's hilariously funny, beautiful inside and out, and loves Jesus a whole lot. (And that's her boyfriend, Micah, who just so happens to be as nice and funny as she is. It must be because they're both second-born children. I don't know :). 

and then there are random things that I'm grateful for that I don't have pictures for:
-my iPod (even though it's on it's deathbed)
-Mom's blog (go check it out. I mean it. She will explain some of the reason why I have been absent here lately)
-my bed
-talking with good friends under the stars with the smell of smoke filling the fall air
-my guitar
-Voddie Baucham sermons (You should listen to this one)  

I'll be back soon with more posts about life and some of the things God is teaching me. 

Until then, stay strong, friends, and have a happy weekend.

a post for Thomas

(I originally wrote this post a few weeks before Thomas' wedding. I shared some of it at the rehearsal dinner when I spoke, but now I think it's time for it to get published.)

 Dear Thomas,

Wow. You're 21 years old, and getting married. You've got a good job, a good girl, and a great God. He's doing crazy wonderful things in your life. I'm so proud of you and happy for you. But....

 you're getting married. How is that possible? You were just a little boy, teaching me how to walk Indian-style, and letting me go squirrel hunting with you and we were exploring the jungles of Africa together.

 Just yesterday (or so it seems) we were at Edisto Beach, and I accidentally almost drowned you. You were trying so hard to save my life, and I fell in the water, and pulled you in with me. Sorry about that, by the way. 
And that same day was the day that you went far out in the water, even though it was freezing cold (in February or March) and you were wearing a sweater, just so that you could save my favorite headband. You were my hero.

 Do you remember the picnic we had outside that windy winter day? We have pictures of it somewhere, but I couldn't find them. Remember the old cooler that we used as a table? That's one of my favorite memories.

Do you remember that time I shot at a squirrel? To this day, I claim I killed it. At the time, you said, "Nah, you didn't kill it. Even if you did, it doesn't count if you can't find it." Funny, it always counted when you couldn't find yours. :) 

Remember that time I was wearing your camouflage pants, and you left me sitting in Dad's driveway? You said, "I've gotta run in the woods, so you stay right here and don't leave, cause when I get back we're going to go have an adventure." I waited, but had to go to the bathroom so so bad! And you must remember how you came back and I had wet my pants. I mean, your pants. 

Remember the above picture? We had a sprinkler, and we held hands and ran 'round and 'round it.

 Do you remember those times you drove me home from Crossroads Choir, and how we would listen to Switchfoot, and you would be so silly? I loved every minute of those rides.

 Do you remember when you went to Washington that summer long ago, when we were little kids and I missed you so so much? And you sent me a postcard, which I still have. And then remember the summer not too long ago when you went to Washington again and I called you to tell you how much I missed you? I think I cried while on the phone with you.

 Remember when you went to South Africa? I was so proud of you for going to tell people about Jesus. When you came back, it was like Christmas morning. I just remember seeing you walking up the terminal and you were smiling so big, and I was crying, and finally meeting your eye and knowing that you were okay.

 Do you remember the day you and Becca got engaged? Of course you do. Such a great day, and yet, kind of sad, too.

 Remember when you went to FLOW in 2011? I sat in your bedroom almost every night, and looked at your Beatles' posters and your dirty socks on the floor and the guitar picks scattered here and there. I think I cried almost every night you were gone.

Remember last July when you moved out? You were really tricky and did so that we wouldn't really have to say goodbye. But I remember the first few days being so hard. I would walk into your room, and it wouldn't be your room anymore. And I remember having no one to stay up late with at night and listen to music and laugh so hard and maybe record some music and hearing cell phones ringing in the background because Becca would call. 

Do you remember the above picture? Mimi took it last Thursday night when you and Becca were at our house planning your rehearsal dinner. I wasn't home and missed seeing you. When I just found it in Picasa, my first thought was: "my boy is a grown-up man now." 

Thomas, we've known each other for a long time.  17 years, 8 months, and 18 days. So many memories, so many songs, so many times you've made me so angry I could spit and made me laugh in the next second. So many times I've cried because you weren't home. So many times you've said, "Jennifer, you've gotta here this song." So many times you've said, "Love you." So many hugs. So many late nights in your room. So many fights. 

You know what? I wouldn't change one minute of our friendship. Cause that's what we've got going on here, Thomas. It's a friendship that is going to last me a lifetime. It's a friendship that is real and true. I know that no matter what mistakes I make, you're still going to love me and encourage me and give me good advice. I know that no matter what stupid things you may do, you're still going to be my hero and my best friend. 

So thanks, Thomas. It's been a wild, crazy, fun-filled ride. I can't wait to see what the next 17 years hold. 

I love you.

-Jennifer

Wedding Recap, Part 4: Pictures In The Park and the Reception

Daddy, Meagan, Michael, Becca, Courtney, Thomas, Lindsay, Josh, me and Jamie

everyone happy :)

I love this picture!

Thomas and Becca (love this one, too!)

going off on their own adventure! :)

All the pictures above are the amazing work of Carson, Lindsay's husband. He was continually snapping all weekend, and got some really amazing shots. You can check out some more of Carson's and Lindsay's pictures on their blog: Down by the Bays.

When the pictures with the bridal party were done, we headed to the reception, while Thomas and Becca stayed behind to take a few more pictures. 

Lindsay made this! :) Impressive, right?

When we got there, it looked somewhat like this:

lots of wonderful wedding guests!

I floated from table to table, seeing some people who I hadn't seen in a while, meeting people I had never met, and seeing some friends who had been at college or moved away! (It was really awesome, because I got to see one of my absolute best friends at the reception who had recently graduated and gone to the Citadel!)

We waited patiently for the bride and groom, and then they were finally there and announced amid great cheering. Literally, they got a standing ovation! =) 

Then it was time for their first dance. Classic is the only word to describe it. =) They danced to a Bob Dylan song (which I can no longer remember the title of!) and acted like little kids and were totally cute. =)

After the absolutely adorable first dance, everyone got started eating! I was starving, but waited to get in line (dumb move) and talked instead. When I finally did get in line, it was at the very end, and I was behind two of Thomas' roommates, so that was highly entertaining! =)

Michael and Josh (wonder what Thomas said to make them laugh?)

Becca and Thomas :)

Becca, Thomas, Michael, Josh and Jamie

Finally I got food and sat down and ate (as Lindsay put it about herself not me) like a barbarian. I was so hungry, much hungrier than I thought I was.The food was delicious. =) Or maybe it was just good because I was so hungry. =) 

those oranges were good!

I think this was the point where Daddy was accusing me of flirting with someone (hence the exasperation on my face! ;)

Becca cutting cake! :)

not exactly sure what that face means???

awwwww! :) (and she is so short!!)

the cake topper was made of sticks found in Becca's backyard!

Thomas and Becca talking to friends

some of Thomas' roommates/friends

The cake was extremely good, and I ate a piece. Or two. =) Actually only one. But I did eat some more the next day. 

Now, Fred (Thomas' roommate and friend) and I were talking and we decided that this reception was definitely going to turn into a dance party. Yep, we called it! People started dancing and really having a good time. Thomas and Becca didn't dance, but basically everyone else did. And let me tell ya, folks, it was awesome! I have no pictures of this, because I was dancing till my feet hurt. And then I danced some more!

Thomas and Becca both changed, and then it was time to say goodbye. I gave my big brother a huge hug, and told him I loved him and then hugged Becca for a long time. 

happiness

Mom and Becca...or...Mrs. Mole and Mrs. Mole :)

Then we all lined the doorway, birdseed in hand, ready to pelt and wish happiness to the newlyweds. =) Mom told me to forget any grudges, and I told Ricky, Thomas' roommate the same thing. But it didn't matter, because we all threw pretty hard anyway. =) Poor Thomas and Becca.

leaving for the honeymoon!!!

she was obviously happy amid the showers of birdseed

notice that Becca's pointing her fingers at Dad? it's a thing they have going on, they point fingers at each other and call each other troublemaker! :)

beautiful wedding guests: Ale' Grace, Lindsay, and Chloe

And then they were gone, and they lived happily ever after. =)

Thomas walking by a train on their honeymoon :)